Dark Shadow Over My Memories

My thoughts are filled with one thing like a lovestruck girl. But in my case, it’s not a crush; it’s something heavier and more serious: the past. Rumination has become a bad habit of mine. I look at the past and find so many things that I label as regrets that I find myself stressed and unhappy.
One year of college has faded away into my memories, and I find myself wishing that I had done more. I should’ve taken advantage of more opportunities, whether in the form of meeting new people through activities and organizations or gathering experience through an internship over the academic year. I feel like I did nothing over the past year. Time flies by so fast; I don’t want my next three years to be like my first. I feel like I’m doing college “wrong.” Then I ask myself, is there a right way?
I need to start chasing away the shadows in my memories and find the numerous blessings scattered throughout. I remember baking cake pops with my friend in the small kitchen in the dorms for a class. I remember laughing so hard when my friends were playing Just Dance in the living room of upperclassmen’s suite. I remember being so grateful when my closest friend ate dinner at 4pm with me in the empty eating hall since my work started so early and ended so late.
Maybe I am doing college right.

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